WMF is upgrading to 14.04 and switching to HHVM.
Although we can't do it yet, we should look at bumping the minimum PHP version we support (considering 5.3 is deaded as far as PHP are concerned), and clean up any hacks/conditionals in core
I guess we should use 5.5.9 as that is what 14.04 brings us... http://packages.ubuntu.com/trusty/php5